Travels in Eire #33

Cailin settled into her window seat for the flight. It was not a full flight so she actually had the seat next to her open to stretch out. She pulled her iPod out of her backpack and tried to find some music to settle down with for the first part of the flight. It was difficult choosing some music that didn't remind her of this incredible trip. She settled on an Irish musician named Phil Coulter who did some very relaxing orchestral pieces called Sea of Tranquility. “Tranquility”, she thought to herself, “is just what I need.”
It would be about a 7 hour flight to New York and then getting through Immigration and grabbing a taxi to her small flat. With the help of the music and an adequate meal along the way, Cailin was able to sleep for a few hours and woke up as they were announcing the arrival in New York in 45 minutes.

The easiest part of this return was the process of getting back to her flat. As Cailin opened the door she noticed how empty it felt. How cold and lifeless. It was still early in the day, so Cailin pulled the curtains open to let the light in. This helped some, but as she stood in the center of the room and looked around she realized how stark this was compared to the B&Bs she had stayed in while in Ireland, and even compared to Darren's parent's home. She immediately missed that. Everything here was so sleek and new. Cailn had always tried to decorate in the modern style thinking that this was what she wanted. If she was shopping now to furnish her flat it would be all antiques and warm woods.

She was startled by the phone. For a few seconds she didn't even respond to it.
“Hello”, Cailin answered her house phone hesitantly.

“It's about time. How long were you going to wait to call us?” her mom sounded a little accusatory.

“Mom, I just walked in the door. I was still getting my bearings.” Cailin was looking at her cell phone in her other hand thinking that she should call Darren.
“Can I at least put my stuff down?”

“It's okay honey, we just missed you all these weeks. Can you make it for dinner? We want to hear all about your trip.” Cailin's mom was not someone you turned down.

“Mom, I'm dealing with a 5 hour time zone change. Can we make it tomorrow instead? I'm beat.”

“Okay, Cailin, but no excuses tomorrow. You've been very secretive about this whole trip. All your calls were cryptic. I know there is something going on. Remember I'm your mom, I can pick up on all this,” and she chuckled as she finished her statement.

“I'll be there about four tomorrow so we can have lots of time to talk,” Cailin answered knowing there was no hiding what she had to tell her parents about her plans.
As soon as Cailin hung up from her mom she dialed Darren. It was so comforting to hear his voice. They didn't speak for very long, but shared how much they already missed each other and hopes that this separation would not take very long. The minute she hung up from Darren her bell buzzed from the outside door.
“Yes?”
“Cailin, it's Tommy from down at Sunny Brook,” a young voice echoed back.

Cailin cringed knowing what was coming, but it was not Tommy's fault and something she would have to deal with, “Come on up Tommy.”

“Hi, Cailin,” said Tommy as she opened the door and he handed her a large bouquet of summer flowers.

“Thanks, Tommy,” Cailin replied as she handed him a tip, took the flowers and closed the door.

How did he know I was back already? Can't I just have a day to myself? I thought he got the message before I left. All these questions and comments were running through Cailin's head as she walked across the room and put the flowers in a waste basket. She didn't want these flowers, didn't want to see them and didn't want to be reminded of all the hurt she had left behind when she went to Ireland.

She walked back to the basket, and grabbed the note attached to the flowers. Maybe she was wrong, maybe these were from Darren. But she knew better.
She gritted her teeth as she read the note:

Honey, so glad you are back. Can't wait until we can spend some special time together. Love Nick.

Cailin was pacing her flat. She was already angry again, and her stomach was in knots. If Nick could do this with just a note, how was she going to handle him all over again? She needed to get control of her emotions. There was no running away anymore. This time she would deal with everything head on. She knew where she wanted to be and it wasn't with Nick.

Cailin spent the rest of the day and evening sitting down and writing down all that she needed to do to fulfill her dreams. And she suddenly realized what she was saying. They were her dreams, and she was going to make them come true.